You might've heard that if a guy is turned on and doesn't get any sort of release, his balls can get painful and bluish—aka "blue balls." This is sometimes used as a terrible excuse to try to guilt someone into sex, which is obviously never OK in any scenario. But apparently, blood flow to the genitals can actually cause discomfort, and it happens to women, too, sex coach Laura Anne Rowell tells Medical Daily.
While it doesn't usually include the same change in color for women, the phenomenon otherwise works pretty much the same way for both sexes, she explains. Basically, blood flows to the genitals during arousal, and the buildup can leave an uncomfortable sensation.
Sexual health researcher Robyn Charlery White, Ph.D., confirms that female blue balls is a real thing for women. "Although less well documented or discussed, some women do also experience heightened sensations of pressure, sensitivity, discomfort, and aching in the pelvic region (more specifically the vagina, vulva, and clitoris) when they have prolonged or peaked sexual arousal but do not orgasm," she says. Although, she adds, many men and women don't experience this at all.
But the fact that we don't often hear women complain about blue balls should tell us something. The biological phenomenon may be real, but the myth that a partner must relieve the tension or something terrible will happen is just that: a myth.
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